Nebraska, Mostly Mean-spirited

Nebraska (the movie) is touted as one of the best movies of 2013.  Its star, Bruce Dern, was nominated for an Academy Award.  I concur with the second opinion and most definitely disagree with the former estimate.  This movie paints a dark and caustic portrait of the heartland of America. Its pallet, black and white—a metaphor for the attitudes the filmmakers insinuate. The color choice whispers old, faded, depressed, unimaginative, zero sum game loser. Nebraska is ungenerous and mean-spirited.

The story begins with an old, disheveled looking man walking along the highway.  He is Woody Grant, played by Bruce Dern.  The character’s name evokes Grant Wood, known for his painting “American Gothic.”  Woody is determined to walk from Montana to Lincoln, Nebraska to claim his magazine sweepstakes million dollar prize.  I’m sure everyone in America recognizes the reference.  Woody will not be dissuaded from his conviction that he is a million dollar winner.  His younger son David, ably played by Will Forte, agrees to drive his dad to Lincoln, Nebraska which is the headquarters of the sweepstakes company.  They set off, with Will trying to convince his father that the trip is a waste of time. The two agree to stop for a family reunion in Hawthorne, Nebraska. In Hawthorne, Woody’s home town, we meet various Grants whose chief occupation seems to be sitting blankly in front of the television.  When the town learns of Woody’s good fortune some try to tap into Woody’s million, citing imagined assistance extended to him when he lived in Hawthorne.  After Woody’s former business partner humiliates him in front of most of the town, Will decides to continue their journey to Lincoln.  This final plot twist during in the last thirty minutes of the movie keeps the film from being unredeemable. Remember, however, that the son was born in Montana.

Nebraska (the movie) reveals Hollywood’s contempt for “red states,” represented by Nebraska (the state). The film’s depictions undermine respect for the dignity of its elderly protagonist, denigrate small town rural America and mock its values.  Hawthorne—heartland, Christian, Republican archetype—devolves into a venal, small minded, sterile, hypocritical and mean spirited American Gothic still life when filmed through Hollywood’s distorted lens. All this from the folks who, in their movies and TV dramas, promote drugs, sex, and all things encouraged.  Hicks 0, Cool Flicks 1.

The lifestyle and characters portrayed in the movie are dull and irrelevant—Zombie-like families riveted to the television whose only recreation consists of heavy bouts of drinking in one of the town’s taverns and overblown reminiscences of youthful sexuality. The lasting image is of an old man propped on an upright chair placed at the side of the only road running through town, going nowhere, waiting for nothing. The movie’s cardboard characters are losers, used up, out of place in the ultra-liberal, tech savvy, connected world of Hollywood. Small town fossils with petrified minds only merit contempt clearly outlined in black and white. 

As for the plot, there is nothing funny about the elderly being duped by sweepstake or other types of scams.  As a librarian I have had frustrating conversations with older patrons trying to convince them that the unsolicited sweepstakes notification did not necessarily mean that they had won a major prize.  Guilt for wanting something for nothing (“I’d best order a couple of magazine subscriptions.”) was carefully balanced with the desire for self-esteem through good luck (“I’m the lucky winner!”) in their minds.  All the sweepstakes company wanted was their money.  Nebraska carefully sidesteps the morality of this one with a shrug and an “oh well.”  …there’s one born every minute.

Why do seniors in particular seem to fall prey to this gimmick? Like Woody, they are trusting; they are lonely.  They want to believe in this final chance at good fortune because of their penury and fear, because they hope that, in leaving a legacy to their children, they will be loved.  A significant prize awards them one final chance to feel alive, involved, and important. Does the movie temper its ridicule with the pathos of grey or an understanding ochre?  Not a chance. Woody’s not a likeable character and he’s a drunk. His quest is less Quixotic than querulous.

Nebraska hits ‘em when they’re down.  Even the semi-warmhearted ending conceals a final slam. I won’t be a spoiler and reveal the ending, but it doesn’t take much to fool some folks! This movie seems to ask when will somebody tell these “booze-addled” old fogies to pull the sod over their conservative, out of touch and used up lives, already long buried by irrelevancy.  Nebraska—no pity; just spite.

The University Brochure

I received a flyer in the mail today from the local university. The school advertises a new master degree program tailored for those over 65. Old students may enroll in the Pre-Senility Master of Old Age graduate program for credit towards their degree, or they may audit individual classes until it becomes necessary to make yearly minimum withdrawals on their 401k. If prospective students are institutionalized they may enroll in the distance learning program. This is an amazing opportunity, as the course listings will readily demonstrate, so forward this posting to your favorite senior citizen now!

Degree Requirements: Successful fulfillment of eight courses, a three-month practicum, and a thesis.

Required Courses:

• Physical Fitness (Pass/Fail) – Students will explore aerobic and anaerobic fitness. Proficiency in the following activities is required “Prescription Pill Container Physics”, “Dancing with Sore Bunions,” “The Peppermint Twist and Shout Back-out-of-Whack Tournament” “Bloodless Toe-nail Clipping” and “Facial Hair Removal without a Magnifying Mirror.” Independent study options depend on Medicare coverage plan.
  
• Tweeting and Texting – Students will tweet and text inane messages to other students until the entire class agree that face-to-face communication, letters, and phone calls are “a thing of the past.” Facebook and MySpace privacy issues will be addressed, then dismissed. Enlarging the number of cyber-friends and family is the goal. Annoying emoticon creation required.
  
• Buster’s Memory Boosters – A favorite course taught by award winning faculty member Beta Amyloid Buster. Strategies for keeping the old noggin sharp include Suduko, Crosswords, Solitaire, and Logic Puzzles. Professor Buster offers priority registration to students who confuse grandchildren’s names and/or who forget their anniversary. The location of the classroom changes for each session so that students with perfect attendance receive an automatic “A.” Pre-requisite: Remembering what you came into the classroom for.

Electives (Choose Five):

• Spending All Your Money – Students will devise a plan to spend all of their children’s inheritance before probate. Those who demonstrate they can do it on the very day of their death receive extra credit.
• De-Clutter Now! – Local psychiatric social workers team up to teach this class. Rules of Disengagement for your valuable collectibles, tattered letters, odd sized screws, photographs with heads cut off, clothes that will never fit, and refrigerated leftovers will be explored. Really, really important pieces of paper will be shredded for the final examination.
  
• Buster’s Memory Boosters – A favorite course taught by award winning faculty member Beta Amyloid Buster. Strategies for keeping the old noggin sharp include Suduko, Crosswords, Solitaire, and Logic Puzzles. Professor Buster offers priority registration to students who confuse grandchildren’s names and/or who forget their anniversary. The location of the classroom changes for each session so that students with perfect attendance receive an automatic “A.” Pre-requisite: Remembering what you came into the classroom for.
  
• Medication Slice and Dice – The high cost of keeping healthy just got cheaper when students learn to cut pills, skip doses, and avoid the donut hole. Extra credit for those students who can correctly sort all medications into their weekly dosage containers before dinner.
  
• Buster’s Memory Boosters – A favorite course taught by award winning faculty member Beta Amyloid Buster. Strategies for keeping the old noggin sharp include Suduko, Crosswords, Solitaire, and Logic Puzzles. Professor Buster offers priority registration to students who confuse grandchildren’s names and/or who forget their anniversary. The location of the classroom changes for each session so that students with perfect attendance receive an automatic “A. Pre-requisite: Remembering what you came into the classroom for.
  
• Buster’s Memory Boosters – A favorite course taught by award winning faculty member Beta Amyloid Buster. Strategies for keeping the old noggin sharp include Suduko, Crosswords, Solitaire, and Logic Puzzles. Professor Buster offers priority registration to students who confuse grandchildren’s names and/or who forget their anniversary. The location of the classroom changes for each session so that students with perfect attendance receive an automatic “A.” Pre-requisite: Remembering what you came into the classroom for.
  
• Conversation Ice-Breakers- How many illnesses, medications and conditions can the student introduce into conversations with friends, family and complete strangers? Specific strategies for dining, bridge, golf, grocery check-out lines, chance meetings, and other social gatherings will be designed to suit every situation. Students should come with a complete list of their “pre-existing conditions” on the first day of class.
  
• Practicum – Advisor permission required, in writing. Explore the “Good Old Days” in a meaningful manner. Students will spend three months in the local high school interacting with teens and teachers. Documentation of student’s reminiscence, lamentations, complaints, and helpful suggestions will be required. Multi-media preferred. The university will not be held responsible for fines, imprisonment, hospitalization fees, or damage to property.

Thesis (Required):
Each student is required to write, present, and defend a thesis. The topic has been determined by the university and is the same for all students. The thesis topic is Learning to Love Irrelevancy. This topic is non-negotiable. Creative and meaningful responses to the Irrelevancy of Old Age will explore topics like:

• “I paid the mortgage on our modest home on time and in full. Why do I have to bail out unqualified debtors in foreclosure?”
  
• “We purchased our fuel efficient automobile ten years ago so where’s my ‘cash for clunkers’—or is the car not the ‘clunker’?”
  
• “Medicare and Medicaid are not equivalent—did you know that?”
  
• “Where is that Money Tree my grown-up children think we have?”
  
• “My deadbeat brother-in-law owes me a bundle I’ll never see. Am I eligible for TARP benefits?”
  
• “If I were an AIG executive, how would I spend my Christmas bonus?”
  
• “My cemetery plot is ‘shovel ready.’ When can I expect the government’s stimulus money?”
  
• "Explore the movitations behind writing a blog no one ever reads."
• “Blackberry is not a fruit. Should the President IM anyone over 30? Do I care?”

Students should send thesis proposals to their advisors before the completion of their final course. You advisor will get back to you eventually.

Evaluation of irrelevancy will be determined by the Death Panel, whose decision will be final.